As I sat in my cold chair at my desk, I simply stared blankly at the teacher who was lecturing us, only reluctantly noticing that I was in a trance of wandering thoughts. I was in another dimension of thought; I contemplated what had happened inside me in the last four or five months. Had this reversal of polarity in my life really helped me? I've noticed that it's a mixed blessing. In any case, why had God put me in that strange position? Sometimes I felt so alone in what I was going through. My classmates just can't understand what's been happening to me these past few months; for them my change of character meant very little or practically nothing. I had already felt completely isolated once in my life. That feeling of isolation was now returning, only now to a much greater extent. I remained immersed in deep, wild thoughts. Mrs. Wertman's steady gaze, given as a warning, brought me out of this trance. I acknowledged my mistake and allowed the lesson to continue. But even though I recognized it, that didn't mean I had to correct it; I lowered my head out of his field of vision and slipped back into deep thought. I was starting to feel very humble; the thought of being the only student at Southridge High School deeply involved in New Age spirituality made me wish I hadn't pursued it with such zeal. But that was then, and this was now. You can't just walk away from these things and return to practical, worldly thinking overnight. I noticed that in recent months many new social rings had formed or collapsed; this was due to my new way of perceiving life and the actions I took to conform to my new opinions and their assertions. God knows... middle of paper... beginning. Did anyone care about what I had just accomplished? than what I had just been given? What did the writing represent? They were advice on how to deal with distant cultures, beliefs and religions; and it made sense in every way, but yet it didn't matter to anyone. For some I had sinned. Now, two weeks later, things are still the same if not worse. The writing I did was a success only to my distant friends, to no one else. They looked at the thoughts and messages I had received and were very impressed and encouraged. But this problem has not been solved, nor do I think it will be until I move off to college. I had felt completely isolated once before in my life. That feeling was now returning, only now at a much greater level. I silently carry forward this cold and peaceful body... Beyond time itself.